Holding It Together

I think lockdown gets to you after a while, that the novelty of getting to work from home and the get togethers on Zoom wears thin pretty quickly.

I think that the time of racing around the internet for news that doesn’t really answer any of my questions is about over. 

I think only being able to go to the supermarket every 10 days, though a necessary restriction, is REALLY hard. Until I think about the people in the world who are trying to buy food and there is none. 

I think the good wishes coming to me and Italy from across the world have truly kept my spirits up and I am so grateful.  But I also think that soon I will have to be sending those same good wishes right back. 

I think my friend in California is letting me win at Words With Friends. 

I think it’s pretty daunting that just because you crossed city lines to go buy wine at the place you like to go to instead of just getting it within your own city limits, you now have a big fine to pay and also have a criminal record.  I think this is the only way some people will understand this country means business and no one is above the law that has been established to protect us ALL.

I think there are people out there that have felt broken because they’ve never fit in. I think I want to tell them that we’re now understanding that it isn’t them that’s broken - it’s the world as we’ve known it that’s been broken all along. And that maybe we’ll have an opportunity to change that. Maybe. 

I think that knowing so many older people - and not so old - have died is heartbreaking but worse is that they died alone, without being able to say goodbye, without anyone to hold their hands. 

I think that it’s sweet that a far away friend called to say “Are you alright? I didn’t see you post yesterday.”  It makes me realize people are paying attention. 

I think that trying to hold it all together makes you really tired inside and that that probably isn’t good for the immune system.  

I think that maybe a little permission to fall apart might be in order.  

I know I’ll be back.